How to Ask Someone to Be a Godparent

Published June 13, 2019
Godparents kissing baby at christening

If you're hoping to designate godparents for your child, you might be wondering how to ask someone to be a godparent. There are many serious or fun ways to ask depending on your personality and the personality of the potential godparent. Look for a way to ask that will be meaningful and memorable to you all.

When to Ask Someone to Be a Godparent

There is no set age when godparents must be appointed, even for baptism purposes. Parents can ask someone to be a godparent before or after the baby is born, but before is ideal. This gives the godparents a chance to bond with the baby from birth.

  • If your child will be baptized at three to five weeks old as is typical, ask the godparents as soon as you set the baptism date.
  • For babies who won't be baptized, you can ask about two weeks before or two weeks after baby's birth.
  • Choose a time when both parents and the potential godparents can be together in a private setting.

Godparent Proposal Etiquette Tips

No matter why you're choosing godparents, it's always a special and intimate request. Keep the proposal formal by asking in person whenever possible. You can include things like cards, letters, or gifts to help you ask in person, but it's best to be with the person when they find out you've chosen them. This gives you the chance to share the special moment and talk about what being a godparent means to each of you.

  • Do include both of the godchild's parents in the request.
  • Do be gracious and understanding if someone declines.
  • Don't ask via text message, instant message, or email. While there are cute and clever ways to do so, these methods feel very impersonal.
  • Don't have someone else, such as a minister, ask on your behalf. The invitation should come directly from the parents of the godchild or the godchild if he's old enough.
  • Don't ask in a social media post. Again, it feels impersonal, but it also puts the recipient on the spot publicly.
  • Don't ask in front of a crowd of people who might feel offended or jealous that they weren't chosen.

Traditional Ways to Ask Someone to be a Godparent

Families who are traditional and want their godparent proposal to feel genuine, heart-felt, and appropriate should choose to ask potential godparents in person. This face-to-face conversation shows your level of seriousness and sincerity. You can simply ask the person to be a godparent or present them with something written to read before giving you a verbal response.

Will You Be a Godparent? Card

You can find lots of great card options online, may find some in stores, or can make your own custom card that includes a picture of the godchild. If you use a card, there are a few things you should definitely include.

  • A note or poem about why you want them to be your child's godparent. For example, "Our son needs to be surrounded by people who are strong, yet gentle and wise, yet understanding. One person we know who embodies all these traits is you."
  • A brief statement about what being a godparent means to you. For example, "As John's godfather, we hope you'll share life lessons with him through letters and cards on special occasions."
  • Information on how and when they can give their response. For example, "Please consider our humble request and give us a call when you have a reply. We'd appreciate your response by May 5 as that's when Jenny will be baptized."
Woman's Hand Pulling White Card From Envelope

Will You Be a Godparent? Letter

You can hand-deliver a godparent proposal letter if the potential godparent lives close to you. If not, you can mail it. When asking someone to be a godparent via letter, make it special with a few personal touches.

  • Use elegant or custom stationary that looks regal.
  • Handwrite the letter with a high-quality pen.
  • Add a gold seal to the back of the envelope and choose a related stamp for the front if possible.

Classic Godparent Request Poem

A short and simple poem written in a letter or card or recited verbally, like this one by Michele Meleen, can say all you need to say.

Every child needs a community
to show him/her what life can be.
As parents we will do our best
to ensure our child is blessed.
We know we can't do it alone
that's why we're asking the best person we've known.
Will you love and guide our child forever
as extended family called godmother/godfather?

Cute and Creative Ways to Ask Someone to be a Godparent

If you'd like to infuse a little more of your own personality, look for cute and creative ways to ask someone to be a godmother or godfather to your child.

Cinderella Godmother Pumpkin

Take inspiration from Cinderella's fairy godmother and ask using a pumpkin and a cute phrase.

  1. Paint a small pumpkin silver or gold to make it look more special.
  2. Add a note that's rolled up like a scroll and reads, "Please help turn our little pumpkin's life into a fairy tale. Will you be her godmother?"
  3. Deliver the pumpkin in person.

Sleeping Beauty Godmother Garden

The Disney movie Sleeping Beauty features three fairy godmothers who care for Aurora most of her life. Create a beautiful fairy-themed container garden to ask your child's potential godmother to fill the role.

  1. Start with a large plant pot.
  2. Use paint and letter stencils to write around the pot, "Will you give our son the gift of being his godmother?"
  3. Add one red, one green, and one blue plant to represent Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather the fairies.
  4. Add a couple fairy house decorative items.

Godfather Contract

Every cute godfather request starts with inspiration from The Godfather movies.

  1. Write up a formal-looking contract on tea-stained paper to make it look old.
  2. Dress up as if you were going to court and take the contract to the potential godfather.
  3. Tell him, "We're going to make you an offer you can't refuse."
  4. After he reads it and accepts, take him to a notary public to have the contract notarized.
  5. Frame the contract and give it to the godfather.

Harry Potter Godfather Wand

In the Harry Potter franchise, Sirius Black is Harry's godfather. Get inspired by this magical world and ask a potential godfather like a real wizard might.

  1. Purchase or make a wand similar to those seen in the movies.
  2. Attach a small note that reads "Accio! We have a Sirius question to ask. Will you cast Lumos over our daughter and light up her life as her godfather? We Expecto great things from this relationship!"
  3. Put the wand and attached note in a decorative long, thin box and deliver.
Vintage still-life with wand

Fun Godparent Proposal Ideas

Think about ways people propose marriage or even ask a date to a prom. You can do something similar to ask someone to be your child's godparent.

Godparent Proposal Poem

Recite a poem, like this one by Michele Meleen, while you're on bended knee holding a gift for the potential godparent.

I'm down on one knee
with an important question to ask.

I'm not asking for marriage,
but a far more important task.

Will you do my family the honor
of being our child's godmother/father?

Godparent Proposal Gift

Offering a relevant gift with your proposal can help take it over the top. You can give the gift as part of your request or after the godparent has accepted the responsibility.

  • Godparent survival kit - Fill a box with items the godparent might need or find humorous such as a picture book about a fairy godmother, a set of fairy wings, and a wand.
  • Godfather t-shirt - Purchase a licensed t-shirt from the movie that simply says "Godfather."
  • Personalized candle - Choose a large pillar candle in a jar and ask that the godparent light the candle whenever he or she thinks of their godchild.
  • Custom stationary set - Put together a stationary set that is monogrammed with the godparent's initials and includes pens, stamps, and cards so they can correspond with their grandchild.

The Request of a Lifetime

Asking someone to be the godparent of your child is the request of a lifetime for everyone. Use your own personality and sincere words to make the request and you're sure to get an emotional response.

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How to Ask Someone to Be a Godparent